[ SHORT STORIES ] - farm - philosophy -

1.Accomodation
2.The Walking Tracks
- #1: The Path as the Venue for Art
- #2: The Forest Path as a Spiritual Journey
- #3: The Main Circuit
- #4: Tracks to the Lookouts
3.The Caves
4.The Hut
5.The Rainforest
6.Tree story
7.Stories from the Original Owner's Children
8.Nell and the Dead Koala
9.Visitors
10.The Cow

1. Accommodation

An offer to artists, hikers, meditators, and hermits , in fact anyone who appreciates nature. At the back of my farm in the mountains, I can offer rustic accommodation. Firstly behind the house is a converted dairy, rather like a grannie flat. It has mains electricity, a kitchen and a bedroom, wood stove, sink with tank water and a septic toilet. In fact it is very comfortable and over the years several different people have stayed there, including children, for years at a time. A conventional car can be driven right to it. About a 10 minute walk into the hills is a small self contained hut. It has a wood stove, a single bed, and a desk and chair and not much else. Water is drawn from the nearby gully. It is situated in a clearing in a forest I planted about 20 years ago close to a piece of rainforest containing some large trees. Into the rainforest and up the hill is the most natural and basic of all human accomodation, a cave big enough to camp in. The facilities here are almost non existent. A platform to sleep on, a fire place, a chair and not much else. Things are crude and rough but I've even has someone visit from far overseas just to experience the rawness of nature. In the past, I've had the very occasional visitor who has appreciated these unique rustic experiences but I'd now like to make the offer more wide spread. On the farm here, I grow forest trees and have successfully planted most of the areas that were cleared for agriculture many years ago. I also have a few cattle and some fruit trees. The other aspect of my farm is for the appreciation of nature. I have made a circuit walking track connecting the places of interest. The swimming hole in the creek, the circular pine tree, the shrine, the lookouts, and the human face in the rock [suiseki] as well as the already mentioned hut, cave and .rainforest. My walking track is also with in an easy distance of the Noosa Trail Network where 100's of kms of walking tracks are being built which also includes other huts, camping areas, bed and breakfasts and farm stays. Have a look at www.noosa.qld.gov.au/strategicplanning/whatsnew.htm. I'm located about 160km north of Brisbane, Queensland, Australia, and if anyone is interested they can contact me by email on forest@spiderweb.com.au Payment is by donation only. I wish to foster a closer relationship between humans and nature. The future of the humanity and the planet may even depend upon it. Bob Whitworth.

2. The Walking Tracks

- #1 The Path as the Venue for Art
Occasionally I have a visitor who comes to experience my beautiful farm and to go for a walk on my walking track. Visitors enter by the large silver cast iron front gate and a sign says a mysterious, "Normality Stops; Reality Begins". Further on up the driveway to the old Queensland style country house. Through another gate and the walking track begins. It is the path that leads us from the comfort of our home into the dark and mysterious world of "The Jungle" and its still untamed and uncivilised ways. The path is the smooth over rough places, the ribbon of comparative safety and security bringing the known into the unknown and bringing a touch of civilisation into the uncivilised. From the path we view into and over the wilds and feel that the unknown has been tamed. Art is the achievement of civilisation but uncivilised nature draws us with the allure of its beauty. My path explores the tension between these two opposites. We start with a swim in the creek to wash away our preconceived perceptions. This miraculous water hole is always full with water no matter how severe the drought and just up stream, the creek is always flowing. What a blessing! Beside the creek is a tree with the initials CM, carved into it. Who did this and in what circumstances he wanted to be remembered by is now totally lost. A little further on, we enter a man made forest. It is more correct to say that this is one of the forests that I've planted and grown myself. This particular forest was made up with plants that were all rejects from the forestry nursery. The trees are all so straight and tall and all planted in ordered rows, well almost anyway. Turn left onto the narrow path and there on our left is a sight where reality needs suspending. A pine tree has done the impossible and instead of growing so straight and tall like all the others has by some freak of nature grown into a circle before continuing its upwards direction. This is not me and my silvan tricks but an act of mysterious untamed Nature. We now glance at a strategically placed rock and the question is posed, is it natural or has it been placed there by the hand of man and if so, for what reason? Is the motivation art or is it just a whim? Man has been placing rocks for thousands of years and I'm drawn to the pastime as well but I don't know why. A small clearing is entered and here is a small and remote hut. Inside is a little mural painted by two hippy girls. One a business graduate from the US with a professional background and a father employed on some secret mission in the Pentagon and the other from NZ. Together they were travelling the great magical land of Oz doing spontaneous abstract murals as acts of goodwill. I never discovered how successfully the US girl returned to the grim reality of her business world. The sign says "The Edge of the Known World". The path is taking us beyond the known. Next a fork in the path marked by a cairn, the ancient sign of human habitation. This should still be standing unless the cows have knocked it down since they hate all aspects of my landscape art. Take the right hand path. If you look carefully at your feet, a little further on, there is a piece of bent and rusted barbed wire. Further to the right, is even the well preserved remains of an old fence. This fence is symbolic of the changes that have occurred. One hundred years ago this was untouched rainforest. It was cleared and burnt and turned into bananas and pasture for cattle and a fence was build with confidence for the future. Now this phase seems almost impossible to perceive as the jungle advances slowly and relentlessly and civilisation is in retreat. This is an example of Australian gothic in the landscape. A now mysterious ruin of a lost or declining civilisation and a way of life now almost totally lost. The next intersection has a track to the left going to a giant and ancient tree [a dottard], a cave big enough to camp in, a dark and deep bat cave, and then the path follows a tunnel of walking height; but we are to complete the circuit and to go straight ahead to the shrine. A seat is on our left to rest and take in the significance of the site. The shrine was made when a cow bone was discovered while planting these pine trees years ago. Since then there have been various donations such as a sea shell, a broken brick, a jewel, a twisted piece of wood, an old and decayed bronze vase and other quirky additions. Visitors are invited to mount the dais, sound the gong, a fortuitously found hub cap, and to give a spontaneous talk on what ever subject is upper most in their minds. For example, to quote a visitor, "I used to walk up to your big silver front gate and think that what ever was beyond it was a mystery, now that I've had a look, I now know that the mystery is even greater!" Yes I like the thought. Visitors are invited to collect a piece of broken pottery and to take it with them and to add it to the walking track where ever it seems appropriate. When we walk the path, we wear it down fractionally and it is beneficial to make a little reparation. These discarded pieces of pottery which were once useful, broken into uselessness and now have become useful again. To walk the path and to be momentarily caught by surprise by a glint of broken pottery may just allow us in the instant to see things differently. Further into the jungle and another seat. Here a drink is offered with a natural chalice from the clear water of a spring in the creek. More broken pottery from times past. Another cairn is slowly rising as suitable rocks are found and added. The path now turns to the right and gradually climbs the hill side. A look out rock is reached with a view over the valley below. In a crevice on the rock cliff behind the lookout is another cow bone. This bone has the word "GOMPA" painted on to it. This bone was found when I planted the Gympie Messmate tree beside the lookout. Bear a moment's thought to the days when one hundred cows lived here and they needed to graze so high up on this rugged hill side for grass. Circumstances change. The word gompa is a shrine dedicated to the Buddha. This was painted by a japanese lady who visited here a year ago. She was of Shinto background but had studied in India for a year. For her, beauty was found at every turn of the path and every twist of a leaf. At suitable places as reverence to nature, she painted a japanese character in water colour paints on leaves, rocks and stems. Upon seeing the cow bone, she prostrated herself in deference to the lost life. On it she paints the word, gompa. In front of the bone, on the rock she paints the english word, "RESPECT" I suppose in an attempt to redeem the situation. Never has my walking track been so greatly appreciated! A little further on are some fig trees growing over rocks. The same species that are growing over the temples at Ankor Wat. A closely related species to the tree under which the Buddha received enlightenment. Just beyond is a human face in the cliff. The face looks rather severe as it looks down on my farm below. On each cheek is painted a japanese character. One is now almost invisible due to the ravages of time and the meaning is now lost, the other is a word that may be translated as respect. Past some over hanging rocks and a ledge with a few offerings and another character. This can still be understood and just recently I was told that it says "thank you". I appreciate the thought. On now to a large seat made from the wood from a giant tree. This tree was so large that the cross cut saw that cut it down had only an inch on either side to work with and so the process was very slow and difficult as the story was told to me by the old man who cut it down in his youth. Eventually the tree was felled and speared down below. We can't help but dwell on human folly. The effort to cut the ancient forest, the effort to grow bananas on the steep slope, the effort to keep it free of weeds for grazing cattle, the lost battle due to the persistence of the invading weeds, the supreme battle to attack the weeds and plant a new forest and the effort to keep the weeds in check until the trees can stand alone. We sit on the seat and ponder! Across a plank and over a semi permanent spring high up on a hill side. A marvel! Further on and to another seat. Looking up and tied into the fork of a shrub, we can see a rock in the shape of a severed head. This is an example of suiseki, a japanese word meaning something found in nature that represents something else. Visitors are invited to take a piece of chalk and enhance the features to perhaps make it clearer as to who is found here. In the middle ages, severed heads were placed on stakes for their shock value and to help maintain law and order. I have not come to a conclusion as to the purpose of this severed head. He now has a chip from his nose from when the cows knocked him down the hill while in a different location. It was quite a struggle to find him in all the lantana and to carry him back up the hillside. Any ideas as to who it is and what I should do with him? Keep walking on, through the eucalyptus forest, onto the slashed track, straight on and in to the rainforest with another large tree. Another seat gives a view to the house below and from another lookout, the scale of the planted forests can be seen. Into now another and older plantation. Here there are now no rows. The trees were initially planted in rows but many died of drought and replanted time and again until the rows are now lost and it looks as if the trees were sown by natural broadcasting. Just off the track, and down into the rainforest is a special and mysterious tree. This very ancient tree I guess to be over a thousand years old. It has the name of Lignum Vitae, a latin word which means in english, tree of life. If you look closely, you can just see grooves cut into the tree. These are spaced and positioned as they were aboriginal toe holds used for climbing. This is contentious but it is what I think. Us the civilised, as we like to think of ourselves, am now face to face with the long lost natural world. Are we civilised or is it just a veneer we put on for convenience. Us the civilised, could we live in the wild or climb this tree? I doubt it. Which is greater, us and our civilisation or the natural world that supports us? How do us the civilised reunite ourselves with the sustaining wild and untamed natural world? Can making paths become as popular as gardening and landscaping? Down the hill across a ruined bridge, and on to the house. The circumambulation is now completed. Can I finish with the word, wabisabi. The profound in the ordinary.

- #2 The Forest Path as a Spiritual Journey.
Is it possible to set up over Australia a net work of hosts who accept visitors as pilgrims to their place? My beautiful farm means a lot to me and I have done much to restore the landscape by large scale tree planting. To help appreciate Nature and the landscape, I have made a walking track. This is a little description of the path and how traversing it as a pilgrim can be experienced as a spiritual journey. Let me know if you would like to visit and experience what I have to offer or if you also have something that other pilgrims would like to know about. Maybe I could start to compile a list. Life is looked upon as being a journey and we all travel upon our own personal path. One situation follows after another and we are the wiser for all of our experiences. My forest path leaves from the known comfort of my secure home and leads its way ever upwards into the dark and mysterious jungle in the hills. We set off from the house, through a narrow gate, which could be a bit difficult to find unless we know where to find it or are being shown the way. A little further on and further up the creek, we come across a swimming hole. A sign says an enigmatic "Normality Ends; Reality Begins". This remarkable water hole is always kept full by the perpetually flowing creek. A swim is offered to symbolically wash away our preconceived ideas by this pure spring fed water. There is a seat below the sign to sit and contemplate. Here there is a coming together of water, meadow, trees, and our first encounter with the dark and mysterious jungle. Into one of the trees opposite, somebody long ago carved the initials CM but the significance is now lost due to the passing of time. Further on, a deviation from the main path is offered. If we follow the row of pine trees to the right, it leads us onto a small plateau once used to grow small crops. Following closely the row of trees, we are being lead around and around in a spiral until the centre is reached. Here we can sit in this vortex of the pine trees and absorb their essence. This species is the choice of my tree planting program and so it is also the primary means of the land's restoration. We sit and look at their tall and vigorous upright growth habit with its symbolic implication{1}. On return, we can either unwind the spiral or take the short cut, cutting across the turns and returning directly to the main path. A little further on the main track, a single pine tree is reached. This is a progeny of a tree my grandfather planted in the back yard of his house in Bunya Street, Brisbane. The bunya is a local rainforest pine closely related to the hoop pine. Just possibly, this tree was planted in memory of his son who was killed in the war. He planted one tree while I have made a massive undertaking of planting thousands of pine trees. What is fated, what is destiny and what is free will? As a boy, I grew many pine trees as they germinated all around me. Three of these trees were kept by my mother through my adolescence and young adulthood to be later returned to me and planted at the front gate here on the farm to stand like guardians. Me, the product of parents, one of whom was born while living in Bunya Street while the other had a bunya pine in the back yard of his parents house. They marry and conceive me in the foothills of the Bunya Mountains. I come here, see the bunya pine at the front gate, [planted by the previous owner in what must have been a flash of precognition against his normal habit], acknowledge my totem, make it my home and my mission of planting thousands of pine trees.{2} Onwards and a start is made up the hill. A turn to the left, and a pine tree is seen that is so strange and unnatural that normal reality needs suspending. The normally straight and upright aspiration of the pine tree has somehow been suspended and the tree has grown itself into a circle against The Natural Laws of Nature. This isn't me and my silvan tricks but a true quirk of nature. A shift in reality. Can we see now that some things must be possible that were once thought impossible? Next a strategically placed rock catches our attention. The question is asked, "Is it natural, or has it been placed here by the hand of man and if so, for what reason?" Yes this is me and my natural art. A little further on and this time there is a spherical rock, a globe, prominently placed. Could you draw a map of Australia onto this globe. Where ever you locate it, it is correct provided it is drawn to scale. The poles and the equator can be added later. Perhaps you could even draw your country if it isn't Australia. Maybe even a stellar constellation from the heavenly sphere but it will need to be an earth centric view of our part of the universe but seeing the constellation from the outside as if in space and not from the earth as we are familiar with them . A piece of chalk is found under the base. We enter a clearing and in it the hut. This is available for anyone who wants to experience the closeness of Nature. A carved sign inside the hut says a cryptic warning, "The Edge of the Known World", to confirm that we are on a path of exploration into the unknown. The path forks and in the middle of the fork, a carne. The traditional sign of human occupation. To the left, a waterfall and a grotto of secret beauty{3}, but we continue on to the right. Again the path forks. To the left is a giant and ancient tree[a dottard]. I guess that this tree is well over a thousand years old. Us humans, to this tree seem small and petty but we have reeked so much damage upon the jungle yet this tree is in serious decline. It is being strangled by a fig tree and its fate is sealed. Above is a cave, big enough to camp in with a place to sleep, a fireplace, and a chair. The cave, the traditional dwelling place for the ascetic, the one who renounces the world to experience the rawness of Nature. Yes very occasionally I have had modern visitors camp in the cave to briefly experience this austere and spartan life. Returning again to the main path, we now come to The Shrine. This was initiated when I discovered a cow bone while planting one of the pine trees here. I then placed a flatish rock over some other rocks to form The Shrine to contain the relics of the cow. A legacy from when things here were quite different. For eons a rainforest existed, it was cleared briefly for pasture and the grazing of cows and now with my assistance, is returning back to forest. Here against the rock is a the paltry token remains of a tree of the lost great forest that was destroyed by the destructive expansion of our civilisation. This is a buttress of a tree that some how survived the clearing and the fire. This is of a rainforest tree called lignum vitae. This is the common name in english but the words are from the latin and mean of all things, "Tree of Life". Since then The Shrine has been expanded by the donation of other quirky objects to encourage introspection and an appreciation of Nature. Visitors are invited to mount the dais and sound the gong, a fortuitously found hub cap, and to give a spontaneous expose' on what ever thoughts are uppermost in their minds, in english or any other language. What we don't learn by the actual meaning of the words, we can learn by their subjective essence. Visitors are also invited to climb up to the next level and to sit on the throne and to have a symbolic dominion over all that is below. Upon departing The Shrine, visitors are invited to choose a broken piece of pottery and to take it with them and then to place it upon the path where ever seems appropriate. The path is always our teacher and in using it, we wear it down fractionally and it is beneficial to compensate for its use. What was once useful, broken by accident into uselessness, is returned to usefulness as a fragment that supports us upon the way. Those passing this way, glimpse out of the corner of their eyes, the flash of a broken piece of pottery[a shard] and in that moment are caught by surprise and in that instant see things differently. The final destination is eventually reached. This is as far away from the house as we go. We can either return the way we came or complete the circumambulation by going on ahead.

This is where my spiritual journey ends. Here in the creek is a tiny permanent spring of crystal clear water. If you look closely through the foliage, we can just see a statue of a goddess. She was found broken in a pile of concrete blocks at the dump{4}. She has now been repaired and returned to the forest to again roam freely. Come the day when The Mysteries can again be restored upon our precious planet and the stupendous task of the redemption of planet earth can commence. A natural rock chalice can be used to dip into the water to quench our thirst. The rock beside the seat has a naturally formed bowl. This can be used for holding water and the performing blessings. We sit and contemplate before returning. Foot notes: 1. I have a book where it discusses the symbolic vertical aspiration of the pine tree, the architecture of gothic church and the Christian cross. 2. If requested, I can show the potential visitor an internet site that has a picture of what it was like in 1975 and the progress of the tree plantings. 3. If specially requested, we can also visit this little grotto but it is a little difficult to climb into. 4. It was the chance discovery of this goddess that prompted me to write out this little story.

- #3. The Main Circuit
I have made a walking track going around the farm which connects many places of the places of interest. It is about a mile long and can be walked relatively easily in about an hour.

There are also other walking tracks linking lookouts and the caves. The walking track passes through quite a variety of landscapes and forest types.

Very briefly it leaves from the house and passes through pasture. It enters a pine forest and continues parallel to the creek until it reaches the hut. It continues on and into the rainforest. The tracks to the cave go off to the left and since the cave walking track is a circuit, it joins the main track a bit further on. Shortly it cuts back leaving the creek and rising gradually up to a lookout with views across the creek towards the caves. It now moves to the western face of the hill and the tracks highest point. There are views down the hill side and past the house. The track continues on passing a spring and on to an east west ridge where it becomes a slashed tractor track before entering some more rainforest. Just before this, the tractor access track goes steeply down the hill to the right and can be followed if a short cut home is wanted.

The tractor track eventually stops and the track skirts to the right overlooking the house in several places. The track now has eucalyptus forest to the left and a young hoop pine plantation to the right. The track now joins the tractor track again and turns to the right. Back into an older pine forest and down the hill to the access track from the road to the house, turn right and back to the house.

- #4. Lookout Tracks
There are several good lookouts here. Two of these are large tors .A tor is a characteristic large round bolder that is common in granite country and are often the lookout site.

There are also two other terminating tracks which lead to two tor lookouts. One is quite close to the house on the northern slope and the other departs the main walking track as it approaches the main creek. It crosses the creek and goes up the southern slope to another large rock and look out. There is a trick to climbing on top on the rock to see the view.

There are 2 caves here. Both are what I believe are called granite bolder caves. They are derived from the holes that are formed from a pile of granite boulders. They are found close together half way up the hill side and in the rainforest

One is large enough for camping in. It has a sleeping platform, one chair in the "living area", and a fireplace with hot plate. The "front door" also doubles as the chimney so it can get a bit smoky until the fire dies down to coals. Other than that there are no facilities.

The other cave is a relatively deep hole of about 20 feet and is frequently inhabited by bats. When the bats are home, it is impossible for us humans to enter. To explore to the bottom requires a torch and to overcome the fear of claustrophobia and God's wrath.

The next time you sit down to eat a steak, bear a thought for that proud but tragically stupid animal, the cow that has had do donate its actual self for you and your passing pleasure. For each mouthful you take, think of all the mouthfulls the cow has had to have made of grass, a food that is so lacking that us humans can only barely eat it at all and then to have to regurgitate it and to chew it a second time before sending it off to the second stomach for further digestion and eventual conversion into meat and milk. The ratio would have to be a million to one. Not only is it a totally disproportionate imbalance, it is some how even worse that slavery because it is a mockery so extreme that we don't even see the joke. We have become too far removed from the reality of the situation. Us humans can be gross lazy fat slobs and the cow, even perhaps bulky with muscle but not fat as us humans are, and having to work so hard just to live on that most desperate food of all, grass; us humans are so totally unaware of the situation that we are blind to the fact that the cow must be carrying a most terrible curse, a jinx from God the Creator, for it all to be so self perpetuating without us even noticing or questioning or being even slightly concerned. Our connection with cattle goes back to the dawn of civilisation. The cow goes extinct in the wild probably because it is just too bulky and stupid to compete in the world but some how survives in the margins of human settlement because the predators of the cow keep their distance from us cunning and ruthless humans and so the close association of humans and cattle is established. Nature must have then decreed that if humans have saved the cow from extinction, they can have as a reward the right to treat them as they like. We then ruthlessly and persistently manipulate the situation to our advantage with the implicit justification that as a creature they only exist due to our protection. The cow would have to be the laughing stock of the animal kingdom. They are big, commonly grow to over one ton in weight but their most notable feature is their stupidity. They have a big brain but it doesn't work very well. They have eyes that look sidewards and can only just see forwards out of the corner of their eyes. Their nose points forwards for smell and their ears can listen either sidewards or forwards but if listening forwards they often block the sidewards vision of their eyes. If you approach a cow, it will try and listen for you and smell you but it cannot see you clearly straight ahead. This sends a confusing message to their dull brain which again further jumbles the information. Maybe a life of grazing is very dull and so a dull brain is a help to pass the time but it comes at a cost which the cow is perpetually paying. The cow knows that it is an at risk creature and so has a furious appetite for grass. It wants to get as big and as fat in as short time as possible for in its great bulk it feels safe. This would have to be the cows biggest error of judgment for this is also the point of common interest between us humans and the cow. We also want them to get as big and fat in as short a time as possible so we can then send them off but here our interests are clearly divergent to the cow's. I'm a small time cattle producer and I know their ways quite well but even me who is sympathetic to their life's dilemma, sometimes as a joke, call our to the cows and ask if they are getting big and fat as fast as possible knowing they will answer yes, which is to my advantage, and they mistakenly think is to theirs. In fact the cow has such an appetite that it will even get through fences to get to better grass to get big and fatter quicker so much so that it becomes a nuisance and has to be sent off for processing even sooner and even bigger. What a tragic joke at their expense. The life of a dairy cow is most disciplined. Me as a minor beef producer an envious of the well controlled and regulated lives of the dairy cow. My beef cattle just wander around aimlessly and look to cause me as much trouble as possible while the dairy cows are so controlled and under the thumb. Any form of dissent is treated most harshly and a tightly regimented order is maintained. Usually the working life of a dairy heifer is set on its dairy path when the young heifer, living with her many sisters and sharing a common boyfriend, falls pregnant and gives birth to her one and only love child. Usually the father is a beef animal and the calf is sent off in a few days and she is inducted into a life of a dairy cow. Here she is fed plenty of grass and in the morning and evenings even comes willingly and lines up outside the dairy to be herded inside, to have the milking machines applied and the milk forcibly pumped out of her. This indignity she does willing all for a few licks of molassas and a cup full of rich grain. Where are her free spirited animal principles? About a month later, she starts to cycle[hormonally] and is fixed up by this time by an unknown and impersonal father who arrived in a test tube. A cow is now lactating and carrying her new infant. No wonder when you look into the eyes of a milking cow, you can see the strain of overloaded motherhood. Cows produce milk in proportion to the amount of grass they eat and life's treadmill is set in motion. Any cow that realises that she is on this working treadmill for little personal gain, decided not to participate in the system and instead of furiously eating grass all day just to have her milk pumped out of her for just a taste of concentrated food and none of her maternal instincts satisfied decides to reject the system and sits under the tree all day. Unfortunately there is a fascist regime in place and free loaders on the system are discovered straight away. Each month there is the dreaded herd recording. Here all cows have their quantity of milk recorded and any cow that is lazy and below her fixed quota is immediately removed from the herd and compliance is maintained. Those that keep up the good work have eight months of lactation and simultaneously carrying the child, an annual month's holiday, birth and back to the treadmill. This time if the calf is a heifer, it is kept to grow up and to eventually replace the non performers of the herd. A couple of days of mothering which is all the only mothering it gets, the young calf is placed in a solitary confinement jail cell and fed plastic milk from a plastic tit attached to a metal bucket. The mother is distressed at the loss of her calf but after a couple of days seems to get over it. The situation is made even more ironically tragic by the fact that the mother walks past the calf's cell with its infant and is with in two feet of it and yet it is too stupid to recognize its own distressed baby. Obviously the calf must feel severe rejection. It is then given this plastic milk for a month and is then released to wander aimlessly with its peers, given a bit of grain until it reaches adolescence. These calves are lost souls with no parental guidance at all and the only contact allowed is with others in a similar predicament. Generation after generation of no mothering, no wonder they are poor parents and yet breed to produce vast quantities of milk from udders so large the cow can hardly carry it. Us humans have become now the consumers of all this milk produced in vast quantities for their now lost babies through the impersonal milking machine as a cold substitute for the babies suckling. What a tragic caricature this long, long, ago noble creature has become. Some cows are so addicted to a life of work and obsessively eating grass that they can actually lactate all the way, passing the repeated dreaded herd recording tests, until they give birth to the next calf while lactating for the first calf and so miss out on their annual month's holiday. A feat I didn't think was possible until I received one of my present generation of calves. Initially he was very runty as too much of his mother's nutrients had gone into milk production and not to him and he was also a quite stressed young calf. I hand reared him with the others on the plastic milk and tit but as he grows older, he is given extra food as molassas and grain and it becomes clear that he has an eating disorder probably similar to his mother as he become crazed and frantic when this food is presented to him and excessively and neurotically suckles his friends ears and other appendages. His name is, Son of Workaholic Mother. Yes, I give all my animals names and yes they all do have rudimentary personalities with their little likes and dislikes. A beef calf on the other hand is mothered obsessively but true to the tragic state of the cow, the calf still grows up to be as stupid and as useless as a dairy calf which receives almost no mothering. It would be nice to think that the loved calf would be a more rounded individual but unfortunately that isn't the case. The excessively mothered beef calf if left alone, eventually grows to be even bigger than the mother and yet she continues to see it as her precious baby who she eats much grass for to keep lactating which the calf keeps consuming all the while she keeps thinking of it as her baby. If feed is in short supply, she can lactate so much and produce so much milk for her calf that she will loose condition and can even die to feed her fat baby who becomes fatter and even more indolent. As the calf grows bigger and if a male reaches maturity, this can lead to such scenes of such debauched and unnatural derrido I balk at describing. Suffice to say that the calf will suckle, then try to mate with his mother, then attempt to gang bang her with his peers, then watch voyeuristically a friend taking a liberty, then fight with his peers, then run off with his mother and suckle again from her for comfort before the whole debauched sequence will occur again and again and this lasting over several days. Yes cattle need the firm guiding hand of us humans. Yes, the bull specifically, but cattle in general, are the symbol of excessive libido energy and with good reason. My neighbour had a bull which he kept well behaved and locked in the bull paddock who couldn't even contemplate the world outside his bounds but occasionally one of my fresh heifers who had been reared on a much more liberal regime, would get into his paddock when their hormones say all systems go. Male calves are fixed up not long after they are born. I have an instrument that I applied to the young calf and although it is almost totally painless in its application they always struggle and resist strongly. This can turns it into quite a wrestle before I always eventually win. On rare occasions, the application hasn't taken and has had to have been reapplied especially if there has been much too much toing and froing and lack of cooperation. Once applied, their lives are much more contented and satisfying but again gratitude isn't shown to us humans for successfully managing their lives. As an animal, the cow is a very immature creature. They are happiest in a herd where they just wander around and generally think nothing other than eating grass. For sport they seem to take pleasure in butting away their friends from any particular tasty mouthful of grass. If they find themselves on their own, they immediately become self conscious and aware of their massive psychological inadequacies, become hysteric and bellow uncontrollably until mania and fear allows them to find the herd and they calm down again. Why the cow is so close to mental instability I don't know but I know from observation that they are very poor sleepers. They only seem to doze lightly even at night and so I suspect that they suffer from sleep apneoa [depravation] and its destructive psychological effect. There have been many occasions when humans, children, in particular have reared an apparently cute calf with much loving care and attention and yet they always grow into something non cooperative and belligerent so much so that it is impossible for anyone that knows the situation to love an adult cow. They do not return the love that has been invested in them. A dog recognizes in us humans something greater than itself. We successfully manages a dog's potentially disorganised lives which they appreciate and so worship us with their faithfulness becoming man's best friend. There is totally no comparison between the two of them. The cow becomes arrogantly aloof and stupid and also hates the dog as being a sell out to the animal kingdom and its unholy close relationship with us humans while it sees itself as being true to its animal heritage. The cow particularly hates the dog's smile and seeing this makes the cow feel sick yet the cow knows that it has a most fragile personality. If it wasn't for us humans managing their lives, they wouldn't even be here. A cow looks at a human and things, boring old you disturbing our lives again. I admit that it is at a price but we keep it a guarded secret and the price they pay. A cow can live to 20 years and even 30 years is possible but a dairy cow is kept working until she is about 10 years old and a beef steer is kept until 4 years. What they don't know they can't worry about. I once had an animal that had 4 collapsed hoofs and so it couldn't compete with the rest of the herd who bullied it,[note the word and its derivation] and took advantage of its crippled condition. I then delivered it personally on the back of my utility to the local processing plant. An easier word to use than the more direct and unsavory alternative word. I dropped him at the back door as told to do so and I could just look in and see the one way conveyor belt and I admit things looked a bit grim. I then went around to the front door and walked into the pleasant air conditioned office with the pretty girls and their smiling faces and were asked simple questions as to where my address was and where I wanted the cheque posted to. Yes, I fortunately felt happy again and left with in an untroubled frame of mind. The cheque duly arrived and was happily banked. Passing a butcher's shop and seeing all those big strong animals now cut into small pieces and put on display is apparently appealing to some but to me it is strangely macabre. Wives go in and choose a steak which they closely inspect for the slightest blemish to select the one the seems the most appetising. Some butcher's shops even have photographs of big fat steers on one side and on the other, the result of him being cut into small pieces. Yes it is all explained there. Maybe there is a reason why the cloven hoof is the symbol of the devil? Why have I written this article. As I have previously mentioned, I'm a small time beef producer and I personally wish to thank all the people who purchase and consume beef. To me beef seems very expensive and I personally don't buy it myself because I don't get much satisfaction from eating meat but meat eaters support me and my idyllic life style because of the price they pay and the money I receive. Yes I admit it, I suffer from the curse of vegetarism. The Achille's heel of the beef industry. How can I justify these apparently divergent views? To me, the cow must be a divinely approved joke. How else could it all pass by with out scrutiny or even notice? The cow in its previous incarnation somewhere else, another planet, another time and circumstance, must have been humans who were excessively lazy and indolent and so this is their ordained punishment. Yes I can accept this and maybe even a sober lesson for us. We punish them so relentlessly and it all seems to be ordaned from above and I go along with it all willingly and my conscience is amazingly and happily clear. What a grateful convenience!

End of story so far.